I'm sad, mad, disappointed and alone

When pregnancy doesn’t happen as planned, the whole world can come crashing down. Without even realising, we tend to make big plans for the future, often based around the idea of a family. And when it doesn’t materialise, it feels like our most important dreams have been ripped away and, in some cases, our purpose in life.

It’s just not fair

Is there anything more heartbreaking than seeing friends and family fall pregnant when you can’t? Babies are suddenly everywhere, often being toted around by unbearably smug parents. It feels like a cruel joke – why is it so easy for everyone else, when it’s so hard for you?

The hardest thing is often that we don’t feel like we can even talk about it. All the feelings that drive us crazy – sadness, frustration, jealousy, anger and bitterness – tend to get bottled up. After all, how can you explain to your newly pregnant friend that seeing her bump makes you want to run to the bathroom and not so silently scream? Sometimes we can’t even confide in our own partners, and when we do they don’t always know what to say.

You don’t need to go it alone

Talking to your partner is important, but it also helps to remember that they’re going through tough times too. It can help both of you to seek some outside support, whether it’s from an understanding close friend or family member, or an online support group. You may be surprised at the support you receive when you open up about things. And if there’s no one on hand, seeing a professional counsellor can work wonders.

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