Pathways to becoming a single dad by choice
Explore how to become a single dad by choice, including IVF and ICSI with donor eggs, and surrogacy in Australia with guidance at every step.
If you have looked into surrogacy or IVF with donor eggs, or you're just starting to explore the idea of becoming a solo dad by choice, we're here to help.
Building your family as a solo dad involves an egg donor and a surrogate, alongside assisted reproductive technology using your own sperm. Here’s what you need to know.
How IVF and ICSI work together with donor eggs
As a solo man, you'll become a parent through IVF or ICSI using a donor egg and a surrogate to carry the pregnancy. Which one your specialist recommends depends on your own fertility and the donor eggs available to you. The key difference between the two approaches is how fertilisation happens.
If IVF is your pathway, your sperm is combined with the donor eggs in a laboratory, where fertilisation happens naturally as the sperm reaches and fertilises the egg. ICSI, on the other hand, gives your specialist more control over fertilisation and is generally recommended over standard IVF in a few specific situations. If your sperm sample shows lower motility or a lower concentration of healthy sperm, ICSI improves the chances of fertilisation actually occurring, since a single sperm is injected directly into each donor egg by an embryologist rather than relying on it to reach and penetrate the egg naturally. It's also commonly used if a previous IVF cycle resulted in poor or failed fertilisation, and is always performed if the donor eggs have been frozen and thawed.
In both IVF and ICSI, the fertilised eggs are left to develop for a short incubation period. Because this pathway involves a donor, any embryos created must then be quarantined for 3 months before the healthiest embryo is selected for transfer to your surrogate's uterus.
What happens on the day of treatment?
On the day of treatment, your sperm sample is collected, washed, and prepared to remove debris and excess seminal fluid, a process that also separates healthy, mobile sperm from those unlikely to fertilise an egg successfully.
From here, we will use either IVF or ICSI to fertilise the donor egg, depending on the quality of your prepared sperm sample and whether your donor eggs are fresh or have been frozen and thawed.
Surrogacy for solo men
A surrogate is a woman who carries your baby through pregnancy, birth, and delivery. In Australia, surrogacy must be altruistic, meaning there can't be any payment for your surrogate's involvement beyond reasonable expenses, and there are strict rules around advertising for a surrogate, which vary by state. Because of this, many solo men find a surrogate through family, friends, or their wider personal network. This can make the path to surrogacy much longer and more challenging than other pathways. Our team is here to support you through every step.
Checking your fertility first
Your first consultation with one of our fertility specialists will include an assessment of your own fertility, including your sperm quality and any genetic considerations worth screening for before you start. The results can also help guide whether IVF or ICSI is the better fit.
Learn about male fertility tests for single dads by choice.
Finding your egg donor
You'll need to select an egg donor before treatment begins. This is a significant decision, and one our donor team supports you through.
Here’s everything you need to know about finding an egg donor.
Ready to take the next step?
Start with a conversation with our fertility concierge to learn more
FAQs
No, surrogacy in Australia must be altruistic, meaning your surrogate can be reimbursed for reasonable expenses but can't be paid for carrying your baby.
Genea is not permitted to advertise for surrogates, but intended parents may be able to advertise their need for a surrogate on social media, internet forums, etc depending on their state. Most solo men find a surrogate through family, friends, or their personal network.
Counselling is legally required when using donor eggs and surrogacy in Australia, and it's a valuable space to think through the practical and emotional sides of these pathways.
It varies significantly, largely because finding a surrogate can take time given the legal restrictions on advertising. Generally it’s a very lengthy process. Your fertility specialist and donor team can give you a clearer sense of timing once your circumstances are known.
At Genea, your surrogate and egg donor cannot be the same person; they must be two separate people.
